So, this weekend was one of the best weekends I've had in a long time! I'm just going to warn you like before, this blog can contain TMI.
I started my cycle on my own! I'm pretty sure I don't know very many girls who celebrate a "monthly bill," but I always get so excited! It means my body worked the way it should last month and that I was that much closer to getting what my heart desires!
So, the minute it turned 8:00, I called the doctor and the first question she asked about was weight loss. No, I haven't lost anymore and Beverly said that Dr. Reshef would like for me to see if I do it again next month without any medicine. Sounds good to me! My hopes aren't up, but I am proud of myself. Beverly asked what we are doing differently, and honestly the only thing that is different is that my new position is so much less stress. I'm not stressing out every day. Beverly said that actually makes a huge difference and that I should learn to stress less. "Let Go and Let God." It's so much easier to type those five words than it is to actually live it, but I am seriously trying.
So, we are going on our annual anniversary trip and going to enjoy ourselves and then when we come home, it's going to be boot camp and weight watchers to get back on track! I will definetly need prayers and encouragement....
But for now, we are going to get ready for our little mini vacation in the cabin by the lake in the hot tub! Be jealous! And watch Facebook for pictures of the cutest couple in the world: Mr. and Mrs. Johnathan & Lucy Muller :)
We are also going to praise God because what this month proves more than anything is that with God all things are possible!
God Bless You All! And Thanks for stopping by!!!
Monday, February 20, 2012
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Who knew a Facebook Share Could be so Powerful?
I haven't written in a while and was suddenly inspired to tonight.
Wednesday nights are so very hard for me, because of my classroom at church. I have one student who has some serious behaviorial issues that no one not even my Nana or Papa can control. I get so stressed out and frustrated that the task at hand (teaching a Bible lesson) becomes a circus.
Tonight was no different. It was crazy and kids don't listen. I came home with a huge headache and so very stressed out. So, I realize I need to post for school and I had a notice that Dr. Reshef had posted a new video.
<script type='text/javascript' src='http://www.news9.com/global/video/videoplayer.js?rnd=278502;hostDomain=www.news9.com;playerWidth=664;playerHeight=400;isShowIcon=true;clipId=6736781;flvUri=;partnerclipid=;adTag=Sales%2520-%2520WorldNow%252033;advertisingZone=;enableAds=true;landingPage=;islandingPageoverride=false;playerType=STANDARD_EMBEDDEDscript;controlsType=overlay'></script>
if that doesn't work....here is the link.....
http://www.news9.com/category/116601/video-page?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=6736781
Anyways, it is about an Oklahoma Weather girl who is battling infertility. I have people who put me down all of the time for battling infertility and PCOS publically since socially, some of the things I blog about is inapproprate to talk about. My answer to that is: Don't read my blog, then.
Anyway, Dr. Reshef is truly amazing and in this video you can really see his compassion and love for his patients. In a way, he has given me the tiniest bit of hope by just posting that video.
Since my last blog, I haven't been dieting or going to the gym. No matter how positive I tried to stay, I couldn't focus. I am so angry that I have to face this and that some of my loved ones have to face this. I am angry that I feel empty and ugly and unwomanly. I am angry that I have to work so hard to lose weight and that my hair is falling out and that I have hair where most women don't have hair. I am angry my arms go empty while literally millions of children are being abused and/or neglected while you are reading this blog. It's not fair.
However, life is not fair. I was not promised a fair life. This video showed me that with a little more hard work and hope and prayer miracles can happen. It also reassured me that I am not alone. I know so many of you are reading this and experiencing the same hurt and anger and confusion that I am and I hope you know you are not alone and I am always here if you need someone to talk/vent/cry to.
My plan is to get back on track with everything that Dr. Reshef has recommended and to get my spiritual life back on track by daily reading and searching for God's plan for my life.
Thank you all for being my sound board, and though I am not sure Dr. Reshef can or is reading this, I really want to thank him for uploading that video on Integris Henry Bennet Fertility Center website.
God bless you all!
Wednesday nights are so very hard for me, because of my classroom at church. I have one student who has some serious behaviorial issues that no one not even my Nana or Papa can control. I get so stressed out and frustrated that the task at hand (teaching a Bible lesson) becomes a circus.
Tonight was no different. It was crazy and kids don't listen. I came home with a huge headache and so very stressed out. So, I realize I need to post for school and I had a notice that Dr. Reshef had posted a new video.
<script type='text/javascript' src='http://www.news9.com/global/video/videoplayer.js?rnd=278502;hostDomain=www.news9.com;playerWidth=664;playerHeight=400;isShowIcon=true;clipId=6736781;flvUri=;partnerclipid=;adTag=Sales%2520-%2520WorldNow%252033;advertisingZone=;enableAds=true;landingPage=;islandingPageoverride=false;playerType=STANDARD_EMBEDDEDscript;controlsType=overlay'></script>
if that doesn't work....here is the link.....
http://www.news9.com/category/116601/video-page?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=6736781
Anyways, it is about an Oklahoma Weather girl who is battling infertility. I have people who put me down all of the time for battling infertility and PCOS publically since socially, some of the things I blog about is inapproprate to talk about. My answer to that is: Don't read my blog, then.
Anyway, Dr. Reshef is truly amazing and in this video you can really see his compassion and love for his patients. In a way, he has given me the tiniest bit of hope by just posting that video.
Since my last blog, I haven't been dieting or going to the gym. No matter how positive I tried to stay, I couldn't focus. I am so angry that I have to face this and that some of my loved ones have to face this. I am angry that I feel empty and ugly and unwomanly. I am angry that I have to work so hard to lose weight and that my hair is falling out and that I have hair where most women don't have hair. I am angry my arms go empty while literally millions of children are being abused and/or neglected while you are reading this blog. It's not fair.
However, life is not fair. I was not promised a fair life. This video showed me that with a little more hard work and hope and prayer miracles can happen. It also reassured me that I am not alone. I know so many of you are reading this and experiencing the same hurt and anger and confusion that I am and I hope you know you are not alone and I am always here if you need someone to talk/vent/cry to.
My plan is to get back on track with everything that Dr. Reshef has recommended and to get my spiritual life back on track by daily reading and searching for God's plan for my life.
Thank you all for being my sound board, and though I am not sure Dr. Reshef can or is reading this, I really want to thank him for uploading that video on Integris Henry Bennet Fertility Center website.
God bless you all!
Thursday, January 19, 2012
In Dire need of encouragment....
So the good new is that we got the internet back! So, I can officially update this blog!
I hope everyone had a fantabulous New Years!
Well, 2012 has not started off the way we had hoped. The last I had written you I had that follicle test that predicted that ovulation for this cycle was unlikely and just as Beverly predicited, I did not ovulate. I waited the 40 days to call Beverly. I did not take a pregnancy test. I knew there would be no point. I can tell by my temperature chart that I did not ovulate. I hate having to call the doctor when I didn't ovulate. It is almost never good news and I usually end up in tears. Well, this time was no different. Beverly gave me three options: #1: A Whiffle Ball Procedure. #2: The fertility shots and #3: Take some time off and focus on weight loss.
I wanted to go with option #1. The whiffle ball procedure has a 70% success rate; however, my insurance will not cover this procedure. And it is just as much as having IVF...so anywhere between $11,000 and $17,000. And seeing that I don't have $17,000 just lying around, that option is not an option.
Option #2 is the same way. Insurance will not cover the shots and since they are now FDA approved to do something, pharmaceutical companies have uped the price from $20 a shot to hundreds of dollars a shot so this shot remedy can cost $2000 a month. So, this options is also not an option.
So that leaves us with option #3 which is what we will be going with. Taking time off to focus on weight loss. I am devasted. I feel like nothing that I've done so far is worth anything and that no matter how hard I'm working, it's not going to happen.
I'm really discouraged and I don't really know what to do next. I even have a hard time making it to water aerobics and counting weight watcher points because I'm not really sure what the point is. Beverly assures me that once I loose weight, there will be a threshold that will be broken and I will ovulate. But, how much more? How much longer? How long will my arms be empty?
Johnathan and I have some decisions and prayer and searching for God. I really need strength and it has to be God's strength because I'm not sure how much I have left in me.
I wish I could give you better news. Right now, I just need some encouragement and prayers and motivation.
Again, thank you all for reading my blog and for your prayers and thoughts and love.
God bless you!
I hope everyone had a fantabulous New Years!
Well, 2012 has not started off the way we had hoped. The last I had written you I had that follicle test that predicted that ovulation for this cycle was unlikely and just as Beverly predicited, I did not ovulate. I waited the 40 days to call Beverly. I did not take a pregnancy test. I knew there would be no point. I can tell by my temperature chart that I did not ovulate. I hate having to call the doctor when I didn't ovulate. It is almost never good news and I usually end up in tears. Well, this time was no different. Beverly gave me three options: #1: A Whiffle Ball Procedure. #2: The fertility shots and #3: Take some time off and focus on weight loss.
I wanted to go with option #1. The whiffle ball procedure has a 70% success rate; however, my insurance will not cover this procedure. And it is just as much as having IVF...so anywhere between $11,000 and $17,000. And seeing that I don't have $17,000 just lying around, that option is not an option.
Option #2 is the same way. Insurance will not cover the shots and since they are now FDA approved to do something, pharmaceutical companies have uped the price from $20 a shot to hundreds of dollars a shot so this shot remedy can cost $2000 a month. So, this options is also not an option.
So that leaves us with option #3 which is what we will be going with. Taking time off to focus on weight loss. I am devasted. I feel like nothing that I've done so far is worth anything and that no matter how hard I'm working, it's not going to happen.
I'm really discouraged and I don't really know what to do next. I even have a hard time making it to water aerobics and counting weight watcher points because I'm not really sure what the point is. Beverly assures me that once I loose weight, there will be a threshold that will be broken and I will ovulate. But, how much more? How much longer? How long will my arms be empty?
Johnathan and I have some decisions and prayer and searching for God. I really need strength and it has to be God's strength because I'm not sure how much I have left in me.
I wish I could give you better news. Right now, I just need some encouragement and prayers and motivation.
Again, thank you all for reading my blog and for your prayers and thoughts and love.
God bless you!
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Not the news I wanted...but Keeping my head up
I knew yesterday was going to end up a bad day.......
My first alarm went off at 5:30 a.m. Johnathan rolls over and says to me, "What time do we have to leave?" I said 7:30 and went back to sleep. The next thing I know Johnathan is gently waking me up and saying, "Babe. It's 7:30. It's time to get up." I jump up and calmly explain (yeah, right) that we should be getting in the car! We rush around and are finally in the car at 7:55 a.m. My appointment is at 10:30 a.m. It usually only takes about 2 1/2 hours to get to Integris Baptist in OKC, but you never know if you will be delayed because of car accidents, construction or traffic. Because of the rain, we only had problems with the first.
We made it on time. We got there, checked in, paid, and waited for Beverly to call my name. Dr. Reshef is on holiday. I'm okay with that. He deserves it. I'm kind of wondering; however, if Beverly ever gets a holiday... Anyways, Beverly takes me back to the table....
Good news!: I have lost 5% of my total body weight and 1 1/2 inches! I have really been working hard on my weight watchers: counting the points and 4 days of the gym. 2 are water aerobics days (because it's cardio AND strength traning) and then 2 days of treadmill and elipitical (a.k.a the Devil Machine). I really really want this and again, this is not killing me only making me feel and look better and ultimately helping become healthier. Also, the lining on my uterus is at a completely normal level for the day of the cycle I was on! Which is GREAT news!
Now on to the bad news..... A follicle test is an extremely uncomfortable ultrasound. I could literally feel her searching for my ovaries. She found my right ovary, no problem; however, she did not find a dominating follicle. A dominating follicle is necessary to produce ovulation. So in lay terms, I am not going to ovulate out of my right ovary any time soon. Then, the search was on for the left ovary. Did you know that your ovaries can move around. I did not. I thought everything had a perfect place in the body. Boy, was I wrong, because Beverly had the hardest time finding that sucker and it hurt. I could feel the ultrasound stick (not sure if that is the right term, but I don't care), literally hitting my uterus! Anyways, she never really was 100% on finding the left ovary which left her nothing but to assume I wouldn't ovulate out of it either. She offered to go and get Dr. Reshef's partner, Dr. Kallenburger, but I declined for two reasons: #1: I was ready to get out of those stirrups. #2: If Beverly was wrong (highly doubtful) then I would ovulate and possible become pregnant.
Beverly sat down and told me to go ahead and continue to temperature chart. This was just Day #17 and I could ovulate as late as day #26. If I did ovulate next week, the follicles wouldn't be ready just yet and she couldn't tell by the ultrasound. If I still did not ovulate I have three options: #1: the fertility shots which are expensive so I doubt we are going to go with that. #2: Laparoscopic Ovarian Surgery also known as the Whiffle Ball procedure. It is where they burn (scary word, I know) small holes into the male hormone producing part of my ovary to help induce ovulation. There are several drawbacks to this. A. I don't know for sure about insurance coverage on this procedure and it will be for sure after the new year when this is done...so hello deductable. B. It will take 3 or 4 days (according to the internet) of recovery time. C. I am sure this is painful. D. It can produce multi-ovualtory reactions meaning multiple births. I am okay with twins and possibly triplets, but not sure about any more. Plus Beverly said that if it produces too many eggs, they will just cancel the cycle. However, the success rates for this is 70%. I can't dismiss a sucess rate of 70%..... And finally #3: Take a few months off and continue with weight loss and excercise, but obviously it works part of the time. After the few months, we will continue with Clomid medication (because I love the mood swings and hot flashes).
Beverly could tell that I was getting discouraged and on the verge of tears. This is so very hard. There is nothing in the world that I want more than to have a baby and to give my husband the best possible gift in the world: to be a daddy. And he is going to be so very good at it. You should see him with the kids at church: He is wonderful. Anyways, as I was chocking back the tears, trying to be strong, Beverly told me to not get discouraged. She said that discouragement will just lead me astray on this 5% weight loss endeavor. She assured me that it will happen and that I am still young. I am only 26 and have plenty of "child bearing" years ahead of me. She always hugs me and tells me she is proud of me. She is an amazing woman. She helped keep my spirits up. She wished me a Merry Christmas and made me promise not to get discouraged.
I'm not going to lie. I am a little discouraged. Every time I go for an ultrasound, I pray that I've misread something and there is a tiny baby on the ultrasound screen. This really hurts. What makes it worse is the kids at church who don't have parents who want them or the people in the news who are harming their children. I want it so badly that i become angry at those people because they do not cherish this precious gift that God gives to them.
As I promised I would not be discouraged, I went to water aerobics last night and I am planning on returning tonight for what Melissa calls "Water Aerobics Boot Camp." I also found these verses to help me get over it. I have to keep in mind that this is God's time and not my own. He is the one that is going to make this work, not Beverly or Dr. Reshef or the medicine or procedures or even myself. It is the Almighty in whom my heart belongs!
My first alarm went off at 5:30 a.m. Johnathan rolls over and says to me, "What time do we have to leave?" I said 7:30 and went back to sleep. The next thing I know Johnathan is gently waking me up and saying, "Babe. It's 7:30. It's time to get up." I jump up and calmly explain (yeah, right) that we should be getting in the car! We rush around and are finally in the car at 7:55 a.m. My appointment is at 10:30 a.m. It usually only takes about 2 1/2 hours to get to Integris Baptist in OKC, but you never know if you will be delayed because of car accidents, construction or traffic. Because of the rain, we only had problems with the first.
We made it on time. We got there, checked in, paid, and waited for Beverly to call my name. Dr. Reshef is on holiday. I'm okay with that. He deserves it. I'm kind of wondering; however, if Beverly ever gets a holiday... Anyways, Beverly takes me back to the table....
Good news!: I have lost 5% of my total body weight and 1 1/2 inches! I have really been working hard on my weight watchers: counting the points and 4 days of the gym. 2 are water aerobics days (because it's cardio AND strength traning) and then 2 days of treadmill and elipitical (a.k.a the Devil Machine). I really really want this and again, this is not killing me only making me feel and look better and ultimately helping become healthier. Also, the lining on my uterus is at a completely normal level for the day of the cycle I was on! Which is GREAT news!
Now on to the bad news..... A follicle test is an extremely uncomfortable ultrasound. I could literally feel her searching for my ovaries. She found my right ovary, no problem; however, she did not find a dominating follicle. A dominating follicle is necessary to produce ovulation. So in lay terms, I am not going to ovulate out of my right ovary any time soon. Then, the search was on for the left ovary. Did you know that your ovaries can move around. I did not. I thought everything had a perfect place in the body. Boy, was I wrong, because Beverly had the hardest time finding that sucker and it hurt. I could feel the ultrasound stick (not sure if that is the right term, but I don't care), literally hitting my uterus! Anyways, she never really was 100% on finding the left ovary which left her nothing but to assume I wouldn't ovulate out of it either. She offered to go and get Dr. Reshef's partner, Dr. Kallenburger, but I declined for two reasons: #1: I was ready to get out of those stirrups. #2: If Beverly was wrong (highly doubtful) then I would ovulate and possible become pregnant.
Beverly sat down and told me to go ahead and continue to temperature chart. This was just Day #17 and I could ovulate as late as day #26. If I did ovulate next week, the follicles wouldn't be ready just yet and she couldn't tell by the ultrasound. If I still did not ovulate I have three options: #1: the fertility shots which are expensive so I doubt we are going to go with that. #2: Laparoscopic Ovarian Surgery also known as the Whiffle Ball procedure. It is where they burn (scary word, I know) small holes into the male hormone producing part of my ovary to help induce ovulation. There are several drawbacks to this. A. I don't know for sure about insurance coverage on this procedure and it will be for sure after the new year when this is done...so hello deductable. B. It will take 3 or 4 days (according to the internet) of recovery time. C. I am sure this is painful. D. It can produce multi-ovualtory reactions meaning multiple births. I am okay with twins and possibly triplets, but not sure about any more. Plus Beverly said that if it produces too many eggs, they will just cancel the cycle. However, the success rates for this is 70%. I can't dismiss a sucess rate of 70%..... And finally #3: Take a few months off and continue with weight loss and excercise, but obviously it works part of the time. After the few months, we will continue with Clomid medication (because I love the mood swings and hot flashes).
Beverly could tell that I was getting discouraged and on the verge of tears. This is so very hard. There is nothing in the world that I want more than to have a baby and to give my husband the best possible gift in the world: to be a daddy. And he is going to be so very good at it. You should see him with the kids at church: He is wonderful. Anyways, as I was chocking back the tears, trying to be strong, Beverly told me to not get discouraged. She said that discouragement will just lead me astray on this 5% weight loss endeavor. She assured me that it will happen and that I am still young. I am only 26 and have plenty of "child bearing" years ahead of me. She always hugs me and tells me she is proud of me. She is an amazing woman. She helped keep my spirits up. She wished me a Merry Christmas and made me promise not to get discouraged.
I'm not going to lie. I am a little discouraged. Every time I go for an ultrasound, I pray that I've misread something and there is a tiny baby on the ultrasound screen. This really hurts. What makes it worse is the kids at church who don't have parents who want them or the people in the news who are harming their children. I want it so badly that i become angry at those people because they do not cherish this precious gift that God gives to them.
As I promised I would not be discouraged, I went to water aerobics last night and I am planning on returning tonight for what Melissa calls "Water Aerobics Boot Camp." I also found these verses to help me get over it. I have to keep in mind that this is God's time and not my own. He is the one that is going to make this work, not Beverly or Dr. Reshef or the medicine or procedures or even myself. It is the Almighty in whom my heart belongs!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Moments with the Mullers: Note to self: Days starting at 2:30 a.m. do not al...
Moments with the Mullers: Note to self: Days starting at 2:30 a.m. do not al...: My day started at 2:30 a.m. Probably from stress and worry about the doctor's appointment, I woke up with a stomach ache at 2:30 a.m. I hate...
Note to self: Days starting at 2:30 a.m. do not always end badly
My day started at 2:30 a.m. Probably from stress and worry about the doctor's appointment, I woke up with a stomach ache at 2:30 a.m. I hate waking up like that. I've come to learn, however; that is the most perfect time to commune with God. After all He is the great Comforter right? Finally after begging forgiveness for all of my sins, pleading with God for good news, and praising God for just about anything I could think of at 2:30 a.m., I was able to return to sleep at 3:30 a.m.
The alarm clock went off at 5:30 a.m., I pleaded with Johnathan to go ahead and shower so that I could have 10 more minutes. :) I can't help it: I'm not a morning person. We officially hit the road at 6:30 a.m. I am so very blessed to have a husband that drives me everywhere and allows me to sleep. True, he understood I am exhausted, but so is he at time. Johnathan Paul Muller is the very best husband a girl could ever ask for. When I dreamed of prince charming when I was little, he didn't come near Johnathan Muller. I love him so very much and he truly is a gift from God.
Now, on the news everyone is on the edge of his or her seat for....No, I am not pregnant. :) But YES! I did ovulate! ON MY OWN! NO CLOMID!!! It is truly a miracle! Alsooooooo, remember when I was whining and fretting about the surgery to remove my lining! I was at a 26 which is 5 times the normal lining! Today I was at a 6! 6! One point above normal and my cycle is still going!!!! Another miracle!!! Want another miracle?!?! I am at the smallest weight of my whole time with Dr. Reshef! I even lost 1.2 pounds since Sunday!! It has been a miraculous day!!! Dr. Reshef could not have praised me more for all of my weight loss and excercise efforts! It's not me that's doing it, but God that is pulling me through this very difficult patch in my life!
The next question is well then what next? What is next is I start another round of Clomid tonight. It is the dose I was supposed to take back in October that I was too scared to take. I am going to continue to temperature chart and ovulation test. I have to go back on December 19 for an ultrasound of my follicles. I am also going to continue the Weight Watchers and water aerobics and treadmill. Most importantly, I am going to continue to praise God for all of the wonderful things tonight.
Here are just a few:
"O my strength, I will sing praises to You; for God is my stronghold, the God who shows me lovingkindness" Psalm 59:17 -- Thank you God for being my strength not only today, but for everyday in every way and situation! Thank you for your love and kindness and grace. You are an amazing God!
"I will praise the name of God with song and magnify Him with thanksgiving" -- Thank you God for an amazing husband, family, church family, coworkers, friends, nurse and physician. These people are truly blessings to me and my family!
"But as for me, I will hope continually, and will praise You yet more and more" Psalms 74:14 -- I will hope continually, because that is all there is to do. Hope and You, O God have given me such an abudance of hope.
"O sing to the LORD a new song, for He has done wonderful things, His right hand and His holy arm have gained the victory for Him" Psalms 98:1 -- Thank you God for the wonderful things you have done for me today. Remind me of this new song that you have given me today.
If you get one thing from this blog, I hope you get the praise and exaltation that I have for God and I hope you can see Him working through me even through these trials! I hope you can see Him working through me and hope you can see His love and mercy that is for you as well.
We still need encouragement as I am about to go and take the Clomid and we all know it doesn't make me nicer :). We need prayer as well.
Thank you all so very much for all your love and support and know that your love is returned sevenfold!
God Bless!
The alarm clock went off at 5:30 a.m., I pleaded with Johnathan to go ahead and shower so that I could have 10 more minutes. :) I can't help it: I'm not a morning person. We officially hit the road at 6:30 a.m. I am so very blessed to have a husband that drives me everywhere and allows me to sleep. True, he understood I am exhausted, but so is he at time. Johnathan Paul Muller is the very best husband a girl could ever ask for. When I dreamed of prince charming when I was little, he didn't come near Johnathan Muller. I love him so very much and he truly is a gift from God.
Now, on the news everyone is on the edge of his or her seat for....No, I am not pregnant. :) But YES! I did ovulate! ON MY OWN! NO CLOMID!!! It is truly a miracle! Alsooooooo, remember when I was whining and fretting about the surgery to remove my lining! I was at a 26 which is 5 times the normal lining! Today I was at a 6! 6! One point above normal and my cycle is still going!!!! Another miracle!!! Want another miracle?!?! I am at the smallest weight of my whole time with Dr. Reshef! I even lost 1.2 pounds since Sunday!! It has been a miraculous day!!! Dr. Reshef could not have praised me more for all of my weight loss and excercise efforts! It's not me that's doing it, but God that is pulling me through this very difficult patch in my life!
The next question is well then what next? What is next is I start another round of Clomid tonight. It is the dose I was supposed to take back in October that I was too scared to take. I am going to continue to temperature chart and ovulation test. I have to go back on December 19 for an ultrasound of my follicles. I am also going to continue the Weight Watchers and water aerobics and treadmill. Most importantly, I am going to continue to praise God for all of the wonderful things tonight.
Here are just a few:
"O my strength, I will sing praises to You; for God is my stronghold, the God who shows me lovingkindness" Psalm 59:17 -- Thank you God for being my strength not only today, but for everyday in every way and situation! Thank you for your love and kindness and grace. You are an amazing God!
"I will praise the name of God with song and magnify Him with thanksgiving" -- Thank you God for an amazing husband, family, church family, coworkers, friends, nurse and physician. These people are truly blessings to me and my family!
"But as for me, I will hope continually, and will praise You yet more and more" Psalms 74:14 -- I will hope continually, because that is all there is to do. Hope and You, O God have given me such an abudance of hope.
"O sing to the LORD a new song, for He has done wonderful things, His right hand and His holy arm have gained the victory for Him" Psalms 98:1 -- Thank you God for the wonderful things you have done for me today. Remind me of this new song that you have given me today.
If you get one thing from this blog, I hope you get the praise and exaltation that I have for God and I hope you can see Him working through me even through these trials! I hope you can see Him working through me and hope you can see His love and mercy that is for you as well.
We still need encouragement as I am about to go and take the Clomid and we all know it doesn't make me nicer :). We need prayer as well.
Thank you all so very much for all your love and support and know that your love is returned sevenfold!
God Bless!
Monday, November 14, 2011
Mission NOT Impossible!
After last blog's boo hoo session (which I'm not going to promise is the last), I really got some inspiration and drive. So today, I started back on weight watchers! After saving up mega points to go out to eat at an Italian restaurant with Johnathan and his family, I still have three points left over! I'm pretty excited for myself.
I know that I said that Johnathan and I were going to go to the gym at 5:30 a.m., but when that alarm when off I just couldn't get up. No worries! We made back from Atoka in time to make it to the gym for a work out. I walked on the treadmill for 25 minutes, did a half mile around the track (running one of those laps), and 2 minutes on the elliptical. Two minutes on that machine (that I'm sure was fashioned in hell) is all that I can handle! lol! I even walked with some 2lbs weights. My arms around my elbows are KILLING me!!! LOL! But I feel great! I took 2 Ibuprofen to help me feel not so sore in the morning, but right now I feel great.
I feel like I can do this! I can get in shape and lose 10% of my weight to ovulate! I'm going to keep this up for a month to make sure I don't cycle and then take the Clomid and pray pray pray pray that it works. I can do this. It's not mission impossible!
While we are working on shaping up our physical bodies, we are also working on shaping up our spiritual bodies. Every morning, Johnathan and I have been doing a Bible study together. We believe it is important as a married couple to go to God together in the mornings. It is also helping our marriage grow!
This morning our devotional spoke to me specifically. The book is 365 Devotions put together by Gary Allen. The Title this morning was Learning to Trust God's Timing. Scripture was Psalm 90:1-12. He says, "I've learned that waiting is a part of life, especially in my walk with God. I have to remind myself often that God does not work according to my schedule. Nor does He count the days the way I do. What seems like a long period of time for me is merely perfect timing with God." I need to remind myself of this daily. Though I may be counting every 30 days (a cycle) God's not counting like I am; He has His own perfect timetable that is perfect for my time and a time to bless me with a baby.
So tomorrow it starts all over. Weight Watchers and gym. I mean it's not killing me, and in the long run, with make me healthier!
So, for now, I am going to pray that I'm not so sore in the morning (lol) and pray that God helps me keep my faith in check!
Thank you all for support. Nothing means more to me than prayers, kind words, and support!
Love you all!
I know that I said that Johnathan and I were going to go to the gym at 5:30 a.m., but when that alarm when off I just couldn't get up. No worries! We made back from Atoka in time to make it to the gym for a work out. I walked on the treadmill for 25 minutes, did a half mile around the track (running one of those laps), and 2 minutes on the elliptical. Two minutes on that machine (that I'm sure was fashioned in hell) is all that I can handle! lol! I even walked with some 2lbs weights. My arms around my elbows are KILLING me!!! LOL! But I feel great! I took 2 Ibuprofen to help me feel not so sore in the morning, but right now I feel great.
I feel like I can do this! I can get in shape and lose 10% of my weight to ovulate! I'm going to keep this up for a month to make sure I don't cycle and then take the Clomid and pray pray pray pray that it works. I can do this. It's not mission impossible!
While we are working on shaping up our physical bodies, we are also working on shaping up our spiritual bodies. Every morning, Johnathan and I have been doing a Bible study together. We believe it is important as a married couple to go to God together in the mornings. It is also helping our marriage grow!
This morning our devotional spoke to me specifically. The book is 365 Devotions put together by Gary Allen. The Title this morning was Learning to Trust God's Timing. Scripture was Psalm 90:1-12. He says, "I've learned that waiting is a part of life, especially in my walk with God. I have to remind myself often that God does not work according to my schedule. Nor does He count the days the way I do. What seems like a long period of time for me is merely perfect timing with God." I need to remind myself of this daily. Though I may be counting every 30 days (a cycle) God's not counting like I am; He has His own perfect timetable that is perfect for my time and a time to bless me with a baby.
So tomorrow it starts all over. Weight Watchers and gym. I mean it's not killing me, and in the long run, with make me healthier!
So, for now, I am going to pray that I'm not so sore in the morning (lol) and pray that God helps me keep my faith in check!
Thank you all for support. Nothing means more to me than prayers, kind words, and support!
Love you all!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)